Parenting a Child with ADHD: Real Tips
If you’re raising a child with ADHD, you already know it’s not always a straight path. Some days feel like you’re finally getting it right, and other days? Well, let’s just say you’re doing your best. I recently completed training to so that I can now say that I am an ADHD Certified Clinical Services Provider (ADHD-CCSP), and I wanted to share what I learned with you—not in a clinical, textbook way, but in a way that actually makes sense for real life.
Let’s Bust Some ADHD Myths
I learned some eye-opening things in this training that I wish more people understood:
Myth: Kids with ADHD can’t focus on anything.
Truth: Actually, they can hyperfocus on things they love! The real challenge is shifting their attention away from something enjoyable to a non-preferred task. That’s why your child can spend three hours building in Minecraft but can’t focus on math homework for 10 minutes.
Myth: If a child isn’t hyperactive, they don’t have ADHD.
Truth: There is actually three types of ADHD, and one of them is “Predominantly Inattentive”. Kids with this type aren’t bouncing off the walls, but they’re still struggling with focus, organization, and forgetfulness.
Myth: Only boys have ADHD.
Truth: Girls have ADHD too—1 in 12 girls, to be exact. They’re often underdiagnosed because their symptoms can look different.
Myth: ADHD is just a childhood thing that kids grow out of.
Truth: ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, which means it’s a brain-based difference. It’s not something kids simply outgrow. In fact, the number of adults who are being diagnosed is growing as we learn more about ADHD.
Myth: ADHD is caused by poor parenting.
Truth: Nope. ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, not the result of parenting choices. You didn’t cause this, so don’t stress.
Myth: Stimulant medications lead to addiction.
Truth: Kids with ADHD do have a higher risk of substance abuse, but that’s related to the ADHD itself, not the medication. Research actually shows the medication doesn’t increase addiction risk, and can, in fact, reduce the risk as it can help manage ADHD symptoms that can lead to substance abuse.
What ADHD Actually Looks Like
Inattention Signs:
Difficulty sustaining focus on tasks
Hyperfixation on preferred activities (which makes non-preferred tasks even harder)
Forgetfulness—like constantly losing homework or forgetting their lunch
Easy distractibility
Trouble following multi-step instructions (they might only catch every third word)
Hyperactivity Signs:
Constant fidgeting or squirming, like they have a motor running inside
Difficulty staying seated—lots of wiggling, standing, repositioning
Excessive talking (and yes, sometimes it feels like they always need the last word)
Impulsivity Signs:
Interrupting others during conversations
Acting without thinking—which can sometimes look like stealing or other concerning behaviors
Difficulty waiting their turn
Important note: These behaviors can vary depending on age, environment, and the individual child. Also, trauma can contribute to similar behaviors, so it’s worth considering the whole picture.
Practical Tips That Actually Help
Here’s what I’m taking away from this training and putting into practice:
1. Create Structure (But Keep It Real)
Consistent routines are your friend. I know, I know—easier said than done. But even small bits of structure help:
Use visual schedules (pictures work great for all of us!)
Set clear expectations and stick to them as much as possible (visual cues/reminders are helpful here too)
Build in reminders that work for your family
2. Give Instructions They Can Actually Follow
Instead of rattling off a list of five things, try this:
Break tasks into smaller, manageable steps
Give one or two instructions at a time
Take a beat (that’s cool talk for pause) after you make a request. Counting to 5, or even 10, can give you kiddo time to process what was just asked of them.
Use positive, specific feedback (“I love how you put your shoes by the door” instead of just “good job”)
3. Let Them Move
Movement isn’t the enemy—it’s actually necessary for many kids with ADHD:
Build in short, frequent breaks
Find opportunities for physical activity throughout the day
Let them fidget if it helps them focus (fidget tools, standing desks, wiggle cushions)
4. Support Their Emotional World
ADHD often comes with big feelings:
Teach coping skills that work for your child. I personally love the Zones of Regulation as this helps with neuroception and is visual.
Model calm responses, even when you don’t feel calm inside
Validate their struggles while helping them build resilience.
5. Make Them Part of the Solution
Your child is the expert on their own experience:
Ask for their perspective on what helps and what doesn’t
Involve them in problem-solving
Listen—really listen—to what they’re telling you
Final Thoughts
Parenting a child with ADHD isn’t about being perfect. It’s about understanding how their brain works, busting the myths that don’t serve them, and finding strategies that actually fit your real life. Some days will be harder than others, and that’s okay.
Ready for Even More Strategies?
If these tips resonated with you, you’ll love episode #80 of my podcast, where I interview Kelly Blitz, an ADHD coach who shares even more practical strategies for parenting kids with ADHD. She breaks down what actually works in real homes with real families—no fluff, just actionable advice you can use today. Head over to www.mendingfamilieswa.com to listen and discover tools that can make a real difference in your daily life.
You’re learning, they’re learning, and you’re figuring it out together. That’s what matters.